The first two chapters of Genesis are arguably the most beautiful in the entire Bible. They paint a picture of perfection. That having been said, chapter three is the saddest, most depressing segment in all of Scripture. In twenty-four short verses, we witness the entrance of an evil vandal who mars the beautiful picture almost beyond repair. For in chapter three, sin leaves its ugly consequences splashed all over God’s wonderful Creation.

In part 1 of this series, we discussed the hard lesson learned by Adam and Eve – that freedom is a package deal which comes with both responsibilities and consequences. With the dawn of reality, they knew they had made a poor bargain with God’s adversary [Satan]. As the awful truth became painfully apparent, God entrusted Woman with a solemn obligation – she must bear children and teach them the lesson she had learned too late.

Teaching and nurturing is a role for which most women are uniquely equipped. Married or single, women generally possess qualities of sensitivity, patience, and compassion which training children requires. All women can not become biological mothers, but all can excel in the God-given role of teacher and nurturer. The former First Lady, who championed the phrase “It Takes a Village,” was right, at least, in one respect. It does take all of our combined efforts to teach responsibility to each new generation. I would hasten to add, however, that the primary responsibility belongs to mothers and fathers – following the guidelines of Scripture.

Begin early

Learning responsibility must begin early. Our postmodern world is teaching young people that there are no absolutes. Rather than recognize the Word of God as authoritative, postmodernists assert that each person should do what seems right to him. This kind of mindset has devastating results in the home and in society at large. (It didn’t work for Cain, either.) It flies directly in the face of the Bible’s directive that “man’s way is not in himself; nor is it in a man who walks to direct his steps” (Jer. 10:23).

The Bible tells us to teach our children about God while they are young. In Deuteronomy 6:4-7 (NASB), the Israelites received this mandate from the Almighty:

“Hear, O Israel! The LORD is our God, and the LORD is one! And you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. And you shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. And you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”

Day after day parents were to remind their children of God’s fundamental lessons for them – a little here, a little there. Some hearers in Isaiah’s day accused the prophet of treating them like children because that was the way he preached to them. They said,

“To whom would He teach knowledge? And to whom would He interpret the message? Those just weaned from milk? Those just taken from the breast? For He says, ‘Order on order, order on order, line on line, line on line, a little here, a little there’” (Isaiah 28:9-10 NASB).

Although they complained that Isaiah sounded like “a broken record,” the fact is that this is exactly how parents must go about teaching their little ones. Basic truths have to be repeated over and over until they become ingrained. This is what nurturing involves. My friend Margaret Hopper, who was principal of David Lipscomb Elementary School for many years, often reminded us as faculty that we have nurtured when we see that a child comes to do what he is supposed to do. It requires much repetition and reinforcing.

The Book of Proverbs teaches that when we train up a child in the way he should go, he will not depart from it when he is old (Prov. 22:6). Commentator Franz Delitzsch has translated the passage from the Hebrew in this way: “Give to the child instruction conformably to His way; so he will not, when he becomes old, depart from it.” He adds these comments:

“The instruction of youth, the education of youth, ought to be conformed to the nature of youth; the matter of instruction, the manner of instruction, ought to regulate itself according to the stage of life, and its peculiarities; the method ought to be arranged according to the degree of development which the mental and bodily life of the youth has arrived at” (The Book of Proverbs, Grand Rapids: Eerdmans,1978, II, pp. 86-87).

Another way of saying this is that if a child is continually taught from his youth, with that teaching being reinforced at every stage with techniques and principles suitable to his understanding, he will gradually absorb the training so that it becomes “second nature” to him. It does not guarantee that a child properly taught when he is young can never be enticed to depart from that which he knows is right. Solomon himself, who wrote these very words of wisdom, is a prime example (see 1 Kgs. 3:9, 12; 11:4). It does offer great assurance that regular, systematic training done properly will almost always produce the desired results in children.

Dare to discipline

We must also begin early to establish habits of good health and good manners. This involves a measure of discipline, which, in the Greek language, denotes the idea of “a sound mind.” Some parents have neglected to train and discipline their children, believing that discipline damages a child’s self-esteem. To the contrary, the lack of it often results in anti-social behavior that lowers self-esteem. One anonymous proverb offers this thought-provoking advice: “Discipline doesn’t break a child’s spirit half as often as the lack of it breaks a parent’s heart.”

The really important lessons of life should begin long before formal education takes place. Robert Fulghum’s classic essay, All I Really Need To Know I Learned in Kindergarten, has been translated into nineteen languages at last count. He calls these rules the “fundamentals of civilization itself.” He begins with these thoughts:

“All I really need to know about how to live and what to do and how to be I learned in kindergarten. Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate-school mountain, but there in the sandpile at Sunday School. These are the things I learned:

“Share everything. Play fair. Don’t hit people. Put things back where you found them. Clean up your own mess. Don’t take things that aren’t yours. Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody. Wash your hands before you eat. Flush.”

Mothers, this is how we begin teaching responsibility to our little ones. These lessons, firmly established, form the foundation for all the other lessons further down the road. Daily we read of murders, rapes, burglaries, vandalism, and other acts of violence in our communities that make no sense. These crimes are committed by individuals who failed to get the message early on that, “I am my brother’s keeper,” and also, what I do affects everyone else.

It will sound simplistic to some, but society’s ills began to multiply when mothers untied their apron strings, went to work outside the home, and left others to teach their babies. This is not a condemnation of working mothers as such. Every situation demands much prayer and thought. But it is still true that “the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.” Young mothers, remember that no job on earth will ever equal in importance the one entrusted to you by God.

Unquestionably, teaching children to be responsible is hard work. (Remember, the dictionary is the only place where success comes before work!) In his helpful book Women Leaving the Workplace, Larry Burkett offers the following insight. “Being a full-time mom will not guarantee happy, well-adjusted children, but at least you’ll know you have done your very best” (New York: Moody, 1995, p. 65).

Given the opportunity, would Mother Eve want another chance with her boys? We can only wonder, but her mistakes provide us with food for thought. Someone has said, “Regret is insight that comes too late.”

Keep teaching, mothers, and be encouraged by the words of Paul, who wrote: “Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we shall reap if we do not grow weary” (Gal. 6:9).